The Learning Center Foundation

What would you assume is the most common “side effect” of a learning disability? Low grades and poor academic performance seems the obvious answer but it’s actually low self-esteem and the inability to build confidence. Parents and teachers pull out their hair in frustration when interacting with learning disabled children but need to remember that these children are quite adept at heaping plenty of self-condemnation on themselves.

Your heart hasn’t taken a blow until you’ve heard a child say “I’m dumber than the dumbest person on earth and everyone knows it”. Group identification is one of the most important things that make a person feel self-assured. Ironically, we as individuals need to feel like we belong before we can individuate. If we feel alone and unlike the rest of the crowd too early on in our development, we begin to feel like misfits, as though life knows what to do with everyone else but us.

Psychologist Martin Seligman first described a phenomenon he coined “learned helplessness”. “Learned Helplessness” is what happens when experience teaches an animal or human that its efforts will have little impact on its circumstances. The human or animal then gives up and stops trying to influence events.

Here’s how it may work with your child. A kid who underachieves over a sustained period of time, becomes convinced that they are unable to learn. They expect failure which undermines much needed determination to achieve success. Students whom have not learned helplessness, believe that if they apply themselves, good results will follow. That has not been the experience of the learning disabled student and they become passive as a result. Some research suggests that what people believe about their ability to learn as well as how much they apply themselves is better at predicting academic success than intelligence.

Pay attention if you hear your child say things like “I’m dumb”, “I can’t do anything right”, or “I’m hopeless”. Frequent protestations of I can’t do this or I can’t do that should also set off alarm bells. Remember, parental attitudes are potent and inflict major influence over a child’s self-esteem. Although not meaning to harm their children, parents create hopelessness by communicating low expectations. A child will look to you to tell them what they are capable of. Statements such as “your teacher just must have been given A’s to everyone that day” when your youngster brings home an A reinforces their view that their true ability is lacking. If you don’t believe they can do it, they certainly won’t. The child is left to feel that working hard to achieve things will make no difference.

The best thing parents can do for their kids is make a positive connection between personal effort and achievement. Supportive parents believe their kids are capable even when that child encounters difficulty performing. The child internalizes this sense of competency which in turn becomes their self-concept. These children are the ones who will apply themselves in the face of difficulty believing that no matter what, effort always makes a positive difference.

Many parents read all of this information and still ask the question, but how do I know? We encourage you to trust your instincts. Sometimes finding out what is going on with your child can be a long and arduous process. Pretending nothing is wrong begins to look appealing. If problems persist, but answers have not been forth coming, trust your gut and press on until you figure it out and get your child the assistance they need.

As of 1997, your child can receive special education support in school based on a formal evaluation. If your child has fallen behind in any of the developmental areas, federal law says they are entitled to special assistance even without being subject to the rigors of testing. Either way, early intervention will greatly help your child enjoy an enriched academic future whether they are eventually diagnosed as learning disabled or not.

Contact The Learning Center to Determine if Your Child Has Learning Disabilities